Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Randomize
