don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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