WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
