I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
I want to have your abortion
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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