Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize
