When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Randomize
