and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
