White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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