Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I think a kid would responsible me up
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
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