I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Is Oprah even human
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
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