i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
