Are we in a gay sports bar?
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Randomize
