is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
