i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize