remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
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