stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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