id be glad to
I can tuck mytits in my pants
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
