Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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