i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I'm having to shit out rocks
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize