and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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