Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
He kissed a someone with a penis
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
