I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
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