Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
