Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Randomize
