the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
