i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
