butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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