They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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