i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
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