CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Randomize
