I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
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