If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
