well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Randomize
