Cold hands, warm shart.
Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
