am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
