is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Randomize
