I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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