I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Randomize
