I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Can I color on your dick again?
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
