Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize