return my video game
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
