It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
Randomize
