So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
