Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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