didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize
