Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Randomize
