It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
