ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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