I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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