the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so thatβs how Syracuse is doing today.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ππππ
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